Dear Family,
There are times in the Christian life when it hurts deeply to keep going. Perhaps you’ve had people talk about you, question your motives, or misunderstand you. Maybe you’ve tried to do what is right, only to be met with suspicion or criticism. Those moments sting more than we like to admit. They can leave us discouraged, sometimes even doubting if it’s worth the effort to keep loving and serving.
I want to say this plainly: you are not alone in that struggle. I have felt it too. And yet, in those very moments, we are invited into something holy – fixing our eyes on Jesus, who endured false words, betrayal, and suffering far greater than ours, and yet walked faithfully in love (Hebrews 12:2).
Keep Your Eyes Fixed on Jesus
When people spoke wrongly about Jesus, he didn’t let their words define him. He entrusted himself to the Father, knowing that truth would ultimately prevail (1 Peter 2:23). That’s not easy for us, is it? Everything in us wants to defend ourselves, to fight back, or at least to prove others wrong.
But here is where the gospel transforms us: when we keep our eyes on Him, we remember that our worth is not found in what others say but in what He says. And He calls us beloved. He calls us His own.
There are days when I myself wrestle with this. Days when I find it hard not to replay someone’s words in my mind. But again and again, Jesus reminds me: “Stay close to me. Let me carry this burden with you.”
Hold Fast to Truth
The temptation, when hurt by lies, is to fight back with more words, sometimes words we don’t even mean. But the call of Scripture is clear – to speak truthfully, because we are members of one body (Ephesians 4:25). That means our words must heal, not harm.
Walking in truth is not just about avoiding lies. It is about aligning ourselves with the freedom Christ gives us. Truth is sometimes costly, but it is always worth it.
If you’ve ever felt the sting of lies, I want you to know: you don’t have to fight for your reputation. Let your life, your consistency, and your faithfulness speak for you. God sees.
Protect the Unity of the Church
One of the greatest dangers when words wound us is the temptation to withdraw or, worse, to contribute to the cycle of gossip or division. But unity is worth fighting for. Scripture urges us to make every effort to maintain the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace (Ephesians 4:3).
Unity doesn’t mean we’ll never disagree. It doesn’t mean people won’t hurt us. What it does mean is that Christ is greater than our differences. Jesus himself said that the world would know we belong to him by our love for one another (John 13:35).
Sometimes pursuing peace feels like swallowing our pride. Sometimes it means forgiving when we don’t feel like it. And sometimes, if I’m honest, it means choosing silence when every part of me wants to speak up. But unity is worth the cost, because it keeps Jesus at the centre, not our own vindication.
A Call to Faithful Living
So where do we go from here? We start with honesty before God. If you’re hurting because of words spoken about you, tell Him. If you’re tempted to retaliate, confess that too. He is not surprised by your struggle, and He does not condemn you for feeling it.
Then we cling to His word, which steadies us (John 17:17). We run to Him as our refuge, especially when we feel exposed or misunderstood (Psalm 46:1). And we choose love above all, for love binds everything together in perfect unity (Colossians 3:14).
I won’t pretend this is easy. It’s not. But I will say this: it is possible. Because Christ Himself lives in us, and He gives us what we cannot find in ourselves – peace that guards our hearts, strength to endure, and love that forgives even the deepest wounds.
A Pastoral Encouragement
Family, if you’ve been hurt by words, know this: God sees you. And you are not defined by what people say in passing moments – you are defined by the eternal word spoken over you by Christ: “You are mine. You are loved.”
Let us be a church that chooses love over division, truth over gossip, peace over retaliation. The world does not need to see a perfect church, but a faithful one. People who love Jesus, cling to truth, and protect the unity He died to give us.
When Words Hurt: Quick Reminders
- Pray first. Take your hurt to Jesus before you take it anywhere else (Psalm 62:8).
2. Don’t retaliate. Respond with gentleness or silence, not harshness (Proverbs 15:1).
3. Anchor yourself in Scripture. Let God’s word steady your emotions (John 17:17).
4. Pursue peace. As far as it depends on you, seek reconciliation (Romans 12:18).
5. Guard your tongue. Refuse gossip or bitterness; speak words that build (Ephesians 4:29).
- Remember who you are. Your identity is secure in Christ, not in what others say (1 Peter 2:9).
A Closing Prayer
Lord Jesus, you know the pain of being spoken against. You endured it, yet you walked in love. Teach us to follow in your steps. Help us when our hearts are heavy, when we want to defend ourselves, when peace feels impossible. Help us to guard our tongues, steady our hearts, and remain in your love for us. Make us a people of truth, unity, and peace, so that the world will see you in us. Amen.
Blessings
Nico